Quick to Help, Slow to Judge

Elder Paul H. Sinclair is a General Authority Seventy. He began with a scripture: “And a little child shall lead them.” Then he told a story about a Primary program.

His young friend James was wearing a new suit. On the sleeves of his jacket there were buttons, but no buttonholes. On the front of his jacket there was a buttonhole, but no button. James had an idea. He buttoned his sleeve to the front of his jacket!

At first James was happy. But then he could not get his arm loose! He was stuck. Elder Sinclair watched and felt more and more annoyed. He shook his head. It was almost time for James to go up and speak.

Then Elder Sinclair saw the little girl sitting next to James. She saw that James was stuck. But she was not annoyed. She wanted to help. She reached over with her tiny fingers and popped the button out of the buttonhole. James was free, and the Primary program was saved!

Elder Sinclair said the little girl taught him a big lesson. He should try to be more like Jesus. A true disciple of Jesus is quick to help and slow to judge. To judge means to decide someone is bad or think less of them.

Jesus showed us how. One day He was tired, and He sat by a well. A Samaritan woman came to get water. Jesus asked her for a drink. Many people may have looked at her in an unkind way. But Jesus was kind to her. He listened to her questions. He taught her. He offered her living water, which means the blessings He gives.

Jesus knew everything about her, but He did not keep reminding her of her mistakes. Elder Sinclair said that to help people change, we look not only at what they did before, but at who they can become.

Missionaries meet many people who need help. Some new members and friends may be afraid that people will judge them. We can help them feel like they have come home.

Elder Sinclair said that when we help people instead of judging them, one by one, in small and simple ways, we help get the world ready for Jesus to come again.

A scripture for this talk: John 4:13–14. Jesus offered a woman at a well living water. We can help people instead of judging them.

Elder Paul H. Sinclair, a General Authority Seventy, began with Isaiah’s words, “And a little child shall lead them.” He said this scripture came alive for him during a ward Primary program.

His young friend James was wearing a new suit. James noticed that his jacket sleeves had buttons but no holes, and his left lapel had a buttonhole but no button. Neither seemed to have any purpose, so James invented one: he buttoned his right sleeve to his left lapel. Being pleased with himself soon turned to panic, because now he couldn’t get loose. He had made himself a one-armed straitjacket!

As James got more stuck, Elder Sinclair got more aggravated, shaking his head in disappointment as James was about to go to the pulpit. Then he noticed the little girl sitting next to James. She had seen what happened too. “But instead of being aggravated, she wanted to help.” She reached up with her tiny, non-judgmental fingers and popped the button out of the buttonhole. James was rescued, and the Primary program was saved. Elder Sinclair said that small moment with tiny fingers helped him see something important about himself.

Elder Sinclair felt relieved, but he also felt a quiet rebuke reminding him that he should be trying to be more like Jesus. It helped him embrace what Elder Patrick Kearon has called a radical reorientation of my soul. He doesn’t remember the topic of the program that day, but he learned through the Holy Ghost that a true disciple of Jesus Christ is quick to help and slow to judge.

The Savior taught this from the start of His ministry. In John 4, Jesus, tired from travel, asks a Samaritan woman at a well for a drink. To her it was an ordinary day until Jesus showed up. “In her ordinary days, she may have endured many judging eyes but few helping hands—until this day.” She apparently had a series of broken relationships. But Elder Sinclair asked, what do we really know about her circumstances? Not much. And those details aren’t what Christ focused on.

Instead, Jesus offered her living water. He spoke to her with dignity. He listened to her questions and answered by teaching. “He did not hold her hostage to her history. He trusted her with truth.” Elder Sinclair said, “Jesus Christ reminds us that to help people transform their lives, we must look not only to their past—we must look to their possible.”

Every day, missionaries meet people at modern-day wells around the world, people who may fear being judged but need help. We are invited to help friends and new members in more Christlike ways. President Dallin H. Oaks has invited us to “seek to be holy, like our Savior,” and being quick to help and slow to judge is a simple way to do that.

Elder Sinclair prayed that when people meet us, they will know they have come home. He testified that when we help people rather than judge them, one by one, in small and simple ways, we are preparing the world for the Second Coming of Jesus Christ.

Elder Paul H. Sinclair, a General Authority Seventy, opened with Isaiah’s line, “And a little child shall lead them,” a scripture that truly came alive for him during a ward Primary program. His young friend James, wearing a new suit, was examining its features: buttons on his sleeves but no holes, and a buttonhole on his left lapel but no button. “Neither the buttons nor the buttonhole seemed to be serving any real purpose. Well, James cleverly devised a purpose for both.” He buttoned his right sleeve to his left lapel.

“Being pleased with himself quickly gave way to being panicked, because once James had buttoned his arm to his chest, even with the flexibility of a Primary child, he could not get himself loose.” He had unintentionally but quite successfully created a one-armed straight jacket. As James became more stuck, Elder Sinclair became more aggravated; the baffling buttons had been put to an uncomfortable and, to him, irritating purpose. He was shaking his head as James was about to go to the pulpit.

Then he noticed the little girl next to James, who had also seen his predicament. “But instead of being aggravated, she wanted to help.” Quickly discerning what was needed, she reached up with her tiny, non-judgmental fingers and popped the button out of the button hole. James was rescued and the program saved. Elder Sinclair felt relief, and also “I recognized the quiet rebuke of a misplaced button and tiny fingers reminding me that I should be trying to be more like Jesus.” The moment helped him embrace what Elder Patrick Kearon has called a radical reorientation of my soul. He doesn’t recall the program’s topic, but the Holy Ghost taught him that a true disciple of Jesus Christ is quick to help and slow to judge.

The Savior taught this from the start of His ministry. In John 4 He ministers to a Samaritan woman whose name we do not know. Weary, He unexpectedly asks her for a drink. Elder Sinclair said, “We can only imagine how many days this woman had been coming to this well at this hour, alone—until this day.” “In her ordinary days, she may have endured many judging eyes but few helping hands—until this day.” She may have done more to warrant judgment than buttoning a sleeve to a lapel; apparently she had a series of broken relationships and was living with a man who was not her husband. “But what do we actually know about her circumstances? Was she widowed? divorced? abandoned? We do not know.” Her story matters, he said, but these are not the details we need.

“What did Christ focus on instead?” The offer of living water. The Redeemer knows absolutely everything about her and comes to be a living witness of living water. He offers her grace and transformative help. He spoke to her with dignity, listened earnestly to her questions, and responded with teaching. “He did not hold her hostage to her history. He trusted her with truth. Jesus Christ reminds us that to help people transform their lives, we must look not only to their past—we must look to their possible.” She left the well changed. “That is precisely what ‘quick to help and slow to judge’ looks like.”

Every day missionaries meet people at modern-day wells all around the world, declaring that Jesus is the Christ, and they find, teach, baptize, and confirm people who may be in fear of judgment but in need of help. We are invited to reorient our souls to help friends and new members in more Christlike ways. President Dallin H. Oaks has invited us to “seek to be holy, like our Savior.” “Being quick to help and slow to judge is a simple and deeply encouraging way for each of us to be more holy, to be more like our Savior, to be His true disciples.”

He prayed that when modern-day men and women at the well meet us, they will know that they have come home, and recognize in us striving disciples ready to fill them with living and loving water. “I testify that when we help people, one by one, in our own small and simple ways, rather than judge them, we are preparing the world for the Second Coming of Jesus Christ.”